On Saturday 18th April, it would have been my late Father’s 81st Birthday, and on 19th, it will be the 22nd anniversary of my dear Mother’s death. As such, I am always in a reflective mood as these anniversaries approach. This year, there is so much more to contemplate, so many concepts that up until the last few weeks would have seemed both alien and unrealistic. Yet, thanks to the presence of COVID 19, we are all looking at life through a different lens, as we come to terms with the new normal.
Everything we took for granted is now under review. Livelihoods, relationships, freedom of movement and the ability to tackle daily life with an unrestricted air of spontaneity is all on hold. As a self-employed consultant and coach, 2020 was getting off to a cracking start. With fingers in a number of different pies, and active aspirations to make myself useful in the diversity and inclusion arena I was really excited about the coming year, but then, everything came to a grinding halt on the day we went into lockdown.
Straight away I found myself in reflective mood, seeking to tune in to everything that was going on around me. Whether it was worrying about my 85-year-old neighbour, confined to her small flat with no safe access to the outside world, or thinking about specific people I knew who were dealing with the crisis from the perspective of acute vulnerability. If I was ever tempted to feel sorry for myself at this time, it was more because I was worried about those whose situations were far more compromised than my own. I am lucky, I am isolated in my own home, and though flying solo, I am able to reach out to others with the use of virtual technology. I have the space and time to focus on developing my own resilience.
I have always been task orientated; where previously I would have set targets such as numbers of meetings, or clarity around new ways of generating revenue, I now find myself working towards different goals. I am reading things that have been gathering dust or rediscovering music that I haven’t thought about let alone listened to for years. Music for me is a bit like a magic carpet that has the power to take you straight back to a time and place, or perhaps just a thought process. I am giving more thought to what I eat, even cooking some things from scratch. Last weekend I borrowed a power washer and jet washed my deck. I’ve taught myself new technology that I would never have had the patience to get my head around, and I have taken time to get to know my neighbours. All of these things have empowered me, and seem to have strengthened my resilience. I believe that I am coming to terms with my own ‘new normal’.
So where next? I have always been driven by a need to feel useful, one of my initial niggles in recent weeks was the idea that I couldn’t find a way to harness my talents and experience to assist the fight against COVID 19. Meyler Campbell, the brilliantly proactive faculty of business coaches with whom I trained, is putting together a pro bono program of coaching for the NHS in which I am hoping to become involved.
I am also now reflecting on how the world will change as a result of COVID 19, and believe that many will require the kind of non-directive, reflective assistance that my coaching approach can provide. We are all in uncharted waters, and our ability to get through them will be anchored somewhat by our ability to understand our own drivers and connect with our own resilience as we ‘adjust to the new normal’.